Shoes

The magic gold flats on my feet flatsyesterday were not mine, they were hers. When she saw me wearing them, she asked for them back. Shoe thief, I quickly labeled myself. Walking in the magic flats, never wanting to give them back.

Frantic to fix my wrong, feeling shame, I shopped for two pair. One for her, one for me. Rushing, breathing, stressing and suffering without reason. Impulse purchases with an opportunity cost. A plane ticket to my next adventure, a month membership at my yoga studio, a week’s worth of groceries.

Shame on me, shoe thief. I should have given them back a long time ago.

Impulsive spending. Two pair of Lucky flats. One size too small.

Meeting to exchange. Calm. Sorry for stealing. Borrowing, really. The magic gold flats that fit so perfectly are not mine, they are yours.

“They’re just shoes. I’ll find more.” Her new pair too big. So cash instead of shoes, the story goes.

Rushing, stressing, should-ing, suffering, complicating uncomplicated life no more.

We let emotions and feelings, shame, warp our hearts out of calm into chaos. We judge ourselves for mistakes so meanly. We let our emotions and self-judgements, shoulds, ruin our financial plans. We forget for a few moments that the whole world makes mistakes. We spend emotionally impulsively when we could just pause and communicate. And eventually laugh.

“They’re just shoes.”

Friendship > shoes.

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